A dandelion among the roses.

BW, JB and I were out running errands yesterday, and one of the stops was at the dollar store. I was looking for cozys for our beer and soda cans so that we could relax by the pool without worrying about the beverages warming up too much.

While there, I told the kids that they had been so good all day that they could each have one item. BW quickly picked out his toy – a spring loaded foam airplane launcher.

JB however, was at a loss for what to get. She said that she wanted something that would make her beautiful so that she could be popular. This is the girl who during the end of year preschool slide show, whenever a picture with her would appear, most of the kids would cheer her name.

Over the course of the day she mentioned the ‘look beautiful so I can be popular’ comment a number of times, and in spite of or perhaps because of the reassurance we’d give her, she grew increasingly more insecure about herself. I’m not sure where it comes from, but I’ve seen it before.

My sister AunT was never truly happy with whom she was, and that she wasn’t able to attain that which she so greatly wanted. She sought the sexiness and allure, the thinness and the glamour akin to what is portrayed in shows like ‘Sex in the City’ or the magazine Cosmopolitan. She was never to accept that she was the dandelion among the roses.

I hope that JB does.

She has a sturdiness about her, a survivability that will take her where she needs to go in life… an intelligence and competition that will let her rise to the top of what ever challenge she takes on. She has a kindness and an intrigue that draws people to her. When you are sad, she’s the one handing you the kleenex and giving you a hug with kind words to make you feel better. She is hardworking, but never fails to laugh, dance and sing when the moment is right. She has a true sweetness about her that I pray never fades.
I also hope with every fiber of my being that she never succumbs to the marketing splash and the peer pressure that tells her she isn’t good enough and that she can be better. I hope that I can do a better job with her than I was able to do with AunT.

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